Illustration by Noel Avendano
1 Jesus Christ, Superstar Because we can never have too much singing during Holy Week.
2 Monty Python's The Life of Brian Because we need a Christ movie so funny it was banned in Norway.
3 South Park: The Passion of the Jew Because we need an animated Jesus more than we need a Walt Disney World--and we HAVE a Walt Disney World.
4 Ben Hur Because Gore Vidal inserted the subplot about the homoerotic romance between Judah Ben Hur and Messala (Never heard of it? Neither did Chuck Heston).
5 The Last Temptation of Christ Because we can all use a little temptation and, after all is said and done, we need a Christ movie from a REAL filmmaker.
Noel Vera is the author of the book Critic After Dark which is also the name of his blog on cinema. Noel Avendano is art director of Chalk, Metro Weddings and StarStudio.